Konatsu's Feelings
by LeaderOfTheCats
Summary: After Konatsu had that...incident at the concert, she wondered if she'd ever recover. She hardly ever talks about how she feels, does anybody really care? [This is just a fan-fiction, not intended to be thought of as canon.]


I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE CHARACTERS IN THIS STORY, THEY'RE ALL FROM TARI TARI!

Konatsu laid still in her bed, feeling horrible. She was a 3rd-year, already, and hadn't been given a chance to sing since that awful concert. The laughter still echoed in her ears, as well as the tears that she cried for hours after. None of her friend came to comfort her that day, they didn't want to be near her. Even Sawa avoided her, although it was mostly due to the tantrums she threw. Still, she teased her about it a lot. Konatsu wanted nothing more to sing, even if she had to sing alone. She practiced in the park almost every day, although no one was listening. When she messed up in the park, at least no one laughed.  
Konatsu clung tighter to her pillow, remembering what her family had said when she came home that day. She had walked in with tear-stained cheeks, wanting just a bit of comfort. "Maybe you just weren't meant to sing, Konatsu?" Her mother had suggested, trying to calm her down.  
Her father had been no better, although he had tried. "Perhaps if you take a break from singing, you'll feel better?" He had offered, as if there was really no problem.  
It had been her brother who had clinched it, though, and made her so angry. "You really aren't good enough to be in the Chorus Club anyway, onee-chan. It's good that you learned that now, before you went too far." He stated, his cold voice showing he didn't care at all.  
Konatsu, enraged and tired of hearing all the put-downs, finally broke. "None of you understand! You're just like those jerks in the Chorus Club! Well, I don't need any of you!" She had screamed at them, running upstairs to her bedroom.  
Konatsu felt tears begin to sting her eyes, as she remembered all the words she had said. Her relationship with her family had never been the same, not after that. She hardly ever talked to them, except in passing. Her brother and her often walked to school together, but he had friends he talked to. She walked alone, humming to herself and dragging her feet. She did have Sawa, but she didn't understand about how much she wanted to sing with others. Of course, after the fight she had with the supervisor, she couldn't stay in the Chorus Club.  
It had been right after their performance, before Konatsu had started to cry. She felt so guilty, but no one was blaming her. They were all staying away from her, though, acting as if she was diseased. It was then that Miss Takakura walked up to her, in her usual way. "Miyamoto-san, what was that? You ruined the whole performance!" She scolded her, her words piercing into Konatsu's heart.  
Konatsu looked up at her, as she sat down on the floor by the stage. Miss Takakura looked angry, and she didn't look like she was going to leave her alone. "I-I practiced, I just got nervous." She admitted, her voice trembling.  
Miss Takakura scoffed, and she crossed her arms. "Everyone was nervous! Did you see them missing a key note?" She questioned, looking down angrily over Konatsu.  
Konatsu looked away from her, glancing around the room for support. No one was going to help, it was only her. Konatsu swallowed back her fear, shaking her head slowly. "B-But...I promise I won't do it again." She asserted, hoping that that would be good enough.  
Miss Takakura sighed, pushing her glasses up. "Miyamoto-san, what good is your promise? If anyone messed up at a concert, it should be grounds for instant dismissal from the club! If we can't rely on you, what good are you?" She asked, sounding very serious.  
Konatsu stared down at her feet, feeling a hot flame burning in her. It wasn't her fault, she had done all she could. She just got nervous, and no one had helped. "...If you want to get rid of me, do it." She whispered, speaking just loud enough for Miss Takakura to hear.  
Miss Takakura raised an eyebrow, staring down pityingly at Konatsu. "Really? You have no other pleads?" She inquired, sounding as if she hadn't expected this.  
Konatsu looked up at Miss Takakura, feeling her eyes burn hot. "I don't care! I don't need any of you jerks anyway!" She shouted at her, getting up to her feet. "Just some stupid Chorus Club!" She said, rubbing at her wet eyes.  
Miss Takakura chuckled cruelly, turning to walk away from Konatsu. "If you feel that way, fine. I hope to see your resignation papers in the morning." She commented, taking a step forward.  
Konatsu growled, and she stepped towards Miss Takakura. "Why would anybody want to stay here with a bitter old cow like you?!" She screamed at her, tears beginning to fall from her eyes. Looking around at the nervous-looking Chorus Club, Konatsu felt nothing but cold hatred "I hate you all!" She wept, as she ran out of the concert hall.  
As soon as Konatsu had said those words, she instantly regretted them. Because of that, she had lost most of her friends, and she could never go back to the Chorus Club. If only she had held her emotions back, she'd be much happier. But...there was no going back, it was too late.  
And so, Konatsu laid on her bed that night. Tears and regret were the only company she had, her brother too busy studying. Sawa would be out riding by now, and by the time she got home, she would go right to sleep. She felt so alone, so pitiful. She was reduced to a page-turner for the pianist, and wasn't allowed to sing anymore. In a school that had one of the biggest choirs in Japan, she wasn't allowed to even participate. She was a 3rd year, and that was the reigning memory of her school years. She had no hope, no chance to sing officially again. Everyone hated her, or at least thought of her as a joke. Why had all that happened to her? What was the point? Lying there, alone on her bed, Konatsu wished. If only there was something she could do...to sing again, with someone who understood.


End file.
